i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
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