Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
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