K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
