At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
ugly people sure do ruin things
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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