Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize
