just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
