Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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