Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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