found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
