Dude, just got a bummer.
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.