White coat. Heels.
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
All I want is dick and wine.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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