It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
