You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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