I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
apparently the secret to your success is patron
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Can I color on your dick again?
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Randomize
