God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
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