You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
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Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
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