All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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