Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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