I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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