Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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