its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
