Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
