You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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