i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
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We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
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ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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