hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
He had one of those small greek statue penises
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Randomize