So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
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