Texts From Last Night

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  (916): View more from California

  put your butt on the phone this is a booty call

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  (916): put your butt on the phone this is a booty call http://tfl.nu/3vuo
  Replies (25) Good night (3002) Bad night (673)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.

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  (405): We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed. http://tfl.nu/cgfh
  Replies (40) Good night (6302) Bad night (523)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.

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  (203): I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust. http://tfl.nu/xny1
  Replies (31) Good night (3908) Bad night (683)
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  (870): View more from Arkansas

  At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!

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  (870): At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins! http://tfl.nu/8m62
  Replies (19) Good night (5782) Bad night (599)
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  (631): View more from New York

  i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world

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  (631): i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world http://tfl.nu/qaz3
  Replies (30) Good night (6819) Bad night (1184)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it

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  (508): Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it http://tfl.nu/y6rt
  Replies (16) Good night (4343) Bad night (958)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.

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  (716): Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten. http://tfl.nu/4lci
  Replies (15) Good night (7186) Bad night (1425)
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it

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  (573): Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it http://tfl.nu/okq1
  Replies (5) Good night (977) Bad night (2981)
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.

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  (859): i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far. http://tfl.nu/eadn
  Replies (13) Good night (3472) Bad night (789)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan

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  (614): I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan http://tfl.nu/3du7
  Replies (3) Good night (2354) Bad night (611)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.

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  (914): Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way. http://tfl.nu/0tc3
  Replies (1) Good night (1167) Bad night (613)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand

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  (304): I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand http://tfl.nu/6s03
  Replies (10) Good night (791) Bad night (1053)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.

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  (678): Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony. http://tfl.nu/3z52
  Replies (3) Good night (708) Bad night (446)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...

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  (925): After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough... http://tfl.nu/vkxi
  Replies (1) Good night (667) Bad night (249)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.

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  (310): Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley. http://tfl.nu/mbvo
  Replies (2) Good night (260) Bad night (554)

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