Texts From Last Night

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  (810): View more from Michigan

  The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!

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  (810): The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure! http://tfl.nu/zlj2
  Replies (1) Good night (1244) Bad night (1926)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.

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  (703): How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time. http://tfl.nu/qie0
  Replies (2) Good night (1554) Bad night (591)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.

  (1-775): View more from Nevada

  What!?!?! How are you txting?!

  (775): View more from Nevada

  Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.

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  (775): Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you. (1-775): What!?!?! How are you txting?! (775): Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend. http://tfl.nu/1ioc
  Replies (55) Good night (1342) Bad night (3302)
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  (906): View more from Michigan

  Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here

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  (906): Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here http://tfl.nu/0qbu
  Replies (12) Good night (6062) Bad night (861)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.

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  (205): It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette. http://tfl.nu/u0k7
  Replies (30) Good night (7299) Bad night (1240)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby

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  (203): all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby http://tfl.nu/jjj6
  Replies (18) Good night (1763) Bad night (5307)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster

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  (630): nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster http://tfl.nu/9e73
  Replies (6) Good night (855) Bad night (3147)
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  (912): View more from Georgia

  Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.

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  (912): Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here. http://tfl.nu/xdo1
  Replies (9) Good night (2419) Bad night (1147)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.

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  (407): Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost. http://tfl.nu/odd1
  Replies (8) Good night (1818) Bad night (774)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Come down off the roof.

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  (847): Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go. (314): Come down off the roof. http://tfl.nu/d3mp
  Replies (3) Good night (2132) Bad night (800)
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  (716): View more from New York

  The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.

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  (716): The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us. http://tfl.nu/j1ej
  Replies (11) Good night (2739) Bad night (701)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.

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  (304): We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow. http://tfl.nu/lf7j
  Replies (7) Good night (732) Bad night (430)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.

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  (413): Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off. http://tfl.nu/bewj
  Replies (5) Good night (635) Bad night (345)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....

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  (503): I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea..... http://tfl.nu/kqab
  Replies (4) Good night (396) Bad night (984)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.

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  (205): You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while. http://tfl.nu/3e5e
  Replies (2) Good night (329) Bad night (724)

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