Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.

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  (703): drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things. http://tfl.nu/24x7
  Replies (2) Good night (1058) Bad night (456)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...

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  (405): I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ... http://tfl.nu/68st
  Replies (16) Good night (3303) Bad night (650)
• Favorite

  (951): View more from California

  I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.

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  (951): I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him. http://tfl.nu/aa9y
  Replies (34) Good night (3415) Bad night (5023)
• Favorite

  (337): View more from Louisiana

  I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.

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  (337): I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week. http://tfl.nu/rnvn
  Replies (27) Good night (4759) Bad night (851)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.

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  (630): Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music. http://tfl.nu/mqx0
  Replies (12) Good night (3178) Bad night (1205)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!

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  (908): It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?! http://tfl.nu/h7d0
  Replies (20) Good night (7998) Bad night (1061)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.

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  (+61): we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry. http://tfl.nu/qm28
  Replies (9) Good night (4809) Bad night (1350)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.

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  (718): knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins. http://tfl.nu/4mi1
  Replies (5) Good night (1846) Bad night (968)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.

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  (715): She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar. http://tfl.nu/6ko7
  Replies (2) Good night (1629) Bad night (966)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.

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  (610): I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch. http://tfl.nu/u06n
  Replies (2) Good night (1269) Bad night (770)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke

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  (317): Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke http://tfl.nu/8yqx
  Replies (3) Good night (914) Bad night (708)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.

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  (510): I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it. http://tfl.nu/j8q4
  Replies (1) Good night (1044) Bad night (390)
• Favorite

  (865): View more from Tennessee

  My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.

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  (865): My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy. http://tfl.nu/ige6
  Replies (4) Good night (1680) Bad night (457)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...

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  (310): That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire... http://tfl.nu/4kfh
  Replies (2) Good night (299) Bad night (501)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.

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  (360): Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex. http://tfl.nu/1puf
  Replies (1) Good night (676) Bad night (283)

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