Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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