i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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