ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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