Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
