: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
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