I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize