And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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