He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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