You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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