You're my little dorito
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
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