Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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