were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
