happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
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