I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize