Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
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