okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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