Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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