Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Found your dick twin last night
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
