This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
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