I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
