I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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