we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Randomize
