guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
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