Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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