capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Randomize